NERDS IN LOVE

Do you ever lie in bed and wonder, "What would be the perfect mathematical expression of my love?"

Well stop wondering, because here's the answer.

SAY CHEESE

Here is a wonderful project that moved me with its honest photography and achingly heartfelt stories. These people really bared their wrinkles and their souls.

I forwarded the link to my very talented friend Khang and we started discussing how to capture portraits of all our friends. Wedding magazines have been really pushing the idea of renting a photobooth when everyone comes together for the Big Event. The results are spectacular!

But the rates are pretty high and the booths feel a little bit "carnie" to me. So we got to talking and bouncing ideas off of each other and came up with something a little more homespun and alot more exciting...at least we think so. It's so wonderful to have creative and generous friends!

Now let's just hope I can execute the plan!

UPDATE 01/09/08 - Our friends and family still rave about the results...and all the fun that they had with it!

IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH

I've been a little under the weather lately, and Naoki lifted my spirits with a special meal: rice porridge served in my Hello Kitty bowls! YAYA!



He was such an excellent nurse that I soon felt well enough to make treats for a Memorial Day BBQ. Hamburgers and cupcakes...is there anything more American?!?!


"Burgers" are made from cookies, frosting, and shredded coconut.

CREASE MONKEY

While Naoki and I still haven't chosen a location for our rehearsal dinner, I've already started on decorations! Think "origami." I've really embraced my new claim on Japanesieness.

UPDATE 01/09/08 - What do you think of the results?

SOUNDS ECLECTIC

King David has generously agreed to play the piano for our wedding ceremony and Naoki and I have finally selected some music! Perk up your ears and listen for some of our favorite love songs...songs that we first learned alongside our parents by listening to the car radio...songs tried and true over the decades. We'll have a little James Taylor, a little Lionel Richie, a little Beach Boys, and of course the Carpenters and Beatles!

Plus, Naoki has hired a DJ for the reception. They're working together on playlists for the cocktail hour, dinner, and dancing. So if you have a special request, be sure to get it in now!

AND FIRST PLACE GOES TO...

We've started receiving replies to our invitations! It's so much fun to find the postcards with little drawings and messages in our mailbox each day.

And who would have thunk it, but a single guy was the first to respond. Good job, Dai!!!

BEDROOM SET

Naoki and I thought our love life might be a little spicier with some sexy lingerie.

So when Alice invited a few of us gals over for a big night of stenciling, I decided to create a little somethin' somethin' for Naoki...




Too bad he refused to model the briefs for your viewing enjoyment.

SEDENTARY STATIONERY

I wanted to add a personal touch to our wedding stationery, and paid the price by spending many long hours hunched over the dining table. At this point it deserves to be called wedding stationAry.

Slicing Japanese paper into strips: Dozens of tiny papercuts
Reviewing multiple printing proofs: Dull headache
Glueing it all onto cardstock: Severe upper back pain
Tying pretty bows: 1 minor hand cramp
Addressing envelopes: 1 major hand cramp

Getting our wedding invitations in the mail and making it that much closer to official: PRICELESS!!!

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: 175 guests are invited to the average wedding. (source: National Association of Wedding Ministers)

NUMBER ONE, ENGAGED

Check out this 24th-century wedding and set your phasers on stunned.

Next time you're in Vegas, you could get married on the Bridge of the USS Enterprise. Getting hitched by a Jean-Luc wannabe would be so much more badass than another rhinestone Elvis. Plus you and your guests can feast on Romulan Warbird!

Make it so.

VEILED CONCEIT

BWAHAHAHA!

This reminds me of that Sex and the City episode where Charlotte freaks out because she has a Hitler-stache in her NY Times wedding announcement.

THE DEVIL'S IN THE DETAILS

The Bishop's Mitre, The Lotus, The Cat's Paw, A Bird of Paradise, The Pyramid...

Are these the names of some obscure martial arts moves? Seedy dive bars? Favorite pages in the Kama Sutra?

Here's an indication that my personality may have strayed beyond "detail-oriented" into "irredeemably obsessive": I spent 2 hours this morning researching napkin folds in order to create the Best Ever Wedding Place Setting.

Also, I would like to point out two napkin folds that should NEVER appear on a dining table.

Your napkin does not belong inside of your drinking vessel...unless you're at a Chinese or Indian restaurant with a sketchy grade from the Department of Health and you think that a couple of swipes with a questionable polyester cloth will eradicate the Hep A cooties partying in your glass.



The choice of napkin color here is especially unfortunate. The last thing I want to find on my dinner plate is a flesh-toned shaft.

TASTY DELIGHT

It's a good thing my wedding dress is fairly forgiving. Naoki and I attended a number of tastings lately, where we dove into our dishes with great appetites and little thought for our figures. The sacrifice was worth it though, since we've now secured the services of a solid caterer and an exceptional pastry chef!

Four Seasons Catering won us over with appetizers so delicious that we forgot to take any pictures during the meal. We're also hoping that the name of the company might mislead some guests into thinking we shelled out a shocking amount of money on their dinners...which they could make up for with generous gifts. :)

A newlywed friend gushed to me about all the compliments she received on her wedding cake and a recent appearance on the Food Network by the designer. Seduced by the idea of a glamorous celebrity cake, I promptly scheduled a tasting.

My visions of sugarplums stopped dancing when Naoki and I pulled up to what appeared to be a meth lab in the slums of Sunnyvale. We stared for a while at the long shed with corrugated steel siding that dominated the gravelly, chain-linked compound. Could this industrial site really be the birthplace of the lovely confection that took 9th place at the National Wedding Cake Competition? Indeed, there was an out-of-place looking sunflower-shaped sign announcing this to be the home of Savory & Sweet Catering.

Once inside, we were pleasantly surprised with both the lack of bubbling cough syrup brewing on hot plates and the presence of an impressive cake display/buffet. Naoki and I spent a few moments admiring the intricate handiwork on the various show cakes, then heaped our plates high with slices from the tasting cakes. Who needs a chemical high when you can have a sugar rush?!?

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: 38% of receptions have a buffet; 34% have a sit-down dinner; 28% serve only cake and punch. (source: National Association of Wedding Ministers)

HEAVEN SENT

It's been raining in the Bay Area, making my daily drive to Pleasanton decidedly UN-pleasant. The usual heavy traffic has slowed to a maddening, grueling crawl. On the plus side, my extended commute gives me time to admire the view. All the showers have brought a mist of grass to the hills and blossoming plum trees dot the highway shoulders. Every rain cloud has a silver lining.

Lest I forget, the Good Powers Above drove the point home this morning by sending a special messenger. Traffic had stopped completely at this point. As I gazed dully out the window, a flutter caught my eye. For a full breathtaking minute, a single white crane walked gracefully alongside my car, amidst the lovely pinks and greens of Spring.

And then I blinked, and traffic started moving again, and I continued on to work.

THE COUPLE THAT PLAYS TOGETHER...

As you may know, Naoki and I are fond of board games. Some people find my competitive spirit quite "inspiring." To my credit, no game has ended in bloodshed...well not since the Great Monopoly Debacle of '88 with Jeffrey. Our family doesn't shy away from heated debate...it's the foundation of a solid Democracy.

Ever since we horned in on a game with Dai and his buddy Drew (and Drew's girlfriend of the time...just as their relationship was breaking up and they were feeling especially bitter. Talk about awkward!), we've been hooked on Settlers of Catan. Klaus Teuber is a genius with a funny name.

We thought our pile of Settlers games and expansions had reached frightening levels until we met Steve. A game designer at Naoki's company, the man loves his work and uses an entire apartment to serve as a storage solution for his vast collection of games. Meet the real Game Keeper.

Another obsession of mine is searching random tags on Flickr. It was in the course of this enjoyable pastime that I found a woman who had combined two of my favorite things: cupcakes and Settlers. Hats off to her!!!



And then I stumbled across the Holy Grail: the 10th Anniversary 3D Special Edition of Cities and Knights. This thing has handpainted resin sculptures and comes in an emblazoned wooden chest! Cost? $400. Holy Crap.

Of course, Steve rushed directly to his local game shop with a fistful of dollars. We joined him, his wife Michelle and a couple of their friends this weekend for the best game of Cities and Knights EVER. Partly because we got to put our grubby little mitts all over his heirloom quality game. But mostly because I won.

TUXEDO SAM

What's good for the goose is good for the gander. Now that my bridesmaids and I had purchased all our finery, it was time to make sure the gentlemen look good on the Big Day too. Naoki and I headed down to After Hours Formal Wear to select tuxedos.

First step, choosing a jacket style. We started with an old school look, the shawl collar.

a ringy-ding-ding


As you can see, Naoki wasn't quite comfortable in that look. So we tried something flashier, the peaked collar.

no broke nigga


The effect was a bit too blingy, so we decided on a more conservative notched collar...which opened up more questions. Number of buttons? Designer? We went with a Tommy Hilfiger, vented 2-button jacket with satin lapels.

And now for everyone's favorite: accessories! For the wedding party, we selected red satin straight ties (Red bow ties screamed "valet.") with red herringbone vests. For the groom, we wanted a look that would coordinate with both the wedding party and the bride. How about a striped ivory tie and red herringbone vest?



A bit too literal, and a bit unbalanced. The tuxedo suit itself will be enough match the boys, so why not switch to an ivory diamond-dot vest and bring the groom a little closer to his bride?


A perfect match!

HOTEL CALIFORNIA

In an effort to up my etiquette quotient and be a gracious hostess, I recently added helpful information to our wedding webpage.

There are plenty of San Francisco guidebooks for visitors who have to see the Golden Gate Bridge and Alcatraz. For anyone wanting to try something a little different, Naoki and I thought it'd be nice to share a bit of local flavor...literally. What does it say about us when the list of our favorite places in the Bay Area is made up almost entirely of restaurants?!? The couple that eats together stays together, right? Like two pudgy pigs in a blanket...

We also wrangled discounts and reserved rooms at a couple of hotels for our guests. Naoki and I personally inspected the most important feature in each:

The Sheraton


or for $30 more...

The Westin

IT'S A WOMAN'S WORLD

A few numbers to illustrate the disparity of wedding planning:

Total number of tasks: 131
Number owned by Tracy: 94 (72%)
Number owned by Traoki: 20 (15%)
Number owned by Naoki: 17 (13%)

Not that I'm complaining, since my inner control-freak demands to personally oversee every aspect. It's just that my inner diva wants to collect on all the credit due her way.

BAREFOOT IN THE PARK

Another Valentine's Day: our sixth together and our first (and only) as an engaged couple! We've always gone out to a nice restaurant in the past, which is nice but unfortunately not very memorable. Of all those times, I can only remember the first...which I highly recommend.

Romantic Souffles for Two...
and the Best French Onion Soup in San Francisco
Cafe Jacqueline
1454 Grant Ave.
415-981-5565
Luckily, this year we are on a budget (Weddings are expensive!) and it forced us to think creatively. With the weather so beautiful lately, we decided to pack a picnic and take a stroll in Golden Gate Park.


Homemade Goodies that Travel Well
Buttermilk Fried Chicken
Pasta & Arugula Salad
Fruit Salad with Lemon Gastrique
Biscuits (Pillsbury)
Fresh Lemonade
Champagne (Obviously, we didn't make this item ourselves.)


All in all, a beautiful and delicious day. We'll never go out for an overpriced Valentine's dinner again!

LOVE TRIUMPHS

This gives me hope that true love lasts.

From yesterday's NY Times:

Barbie and Ken reunite!

Thank God.

FRANZ & HANS ARE HERE...

Had another major asthma attack last night...kept drifting in and out of sleep and dreamt about being trapped scuba diving with a low oxygen tank.

Saw the doctor today, who said I should have been in the hospital!?! He gave me two rounds on the nebulizer, and then prescribed freaking steroids. STEROIDS!!! So when a big hairy man with a high-pitched voice comes down the aisle in September, don't worry...it really is me. A chemically enhanced me.

OLD SPICE

TOP 3 REASONS WHY NAOKI IS REALLY AN OLD MAN:

1) He keeps his trouser socks on in bed. Grrr, baby, grrr!

2) He drives a big silver sedan that could swallow an Accord for lunch...plus a Miata for dessert.

3) He covets man jewelry. The only thing he wanted as a wedding gift was a dress set to wear on The Big Day. No pressure for me.

Cufflinks I can buy. Macy's carries links. The Gap has links. The toothless lady selling macrame crafts outside the BART station sells links.

But NOBODY sells tie pins anymore. I've shopped at Neiman's, Barneys, Bloomies, and Malouf's. Nada. Judging from the frightening assortment available on eBay, tie pins seem to have gone out of vogue in the early '70s when they ran out of animals to shape from precious metals. And people stopped joining the Kiwanis.

Luckily my fairy grandmother stepped in and passed along some of her jewelry as a birthday gift last year. Naoki and I headed down to Joe Escobar this weekend to pick up our wedding bands. And while there, we commissioned a shiny new tie pin and cufflinks to be made from a diamond cocktail ring and 24k gold bangles.

So be on the lookout for Naoki on September 9. He'll be the guy blinging out in the afternoon sunlight.

DESTINATION: CELEBRATION

My current wedding checklist has 130 tasks in 18 categories...and it grows bigger every day. Of course, entering such a list into a spreadsheet and parsing it (by category, by month, by status, by owner, etc.) can provide hours of amusement for a Type-A freak such as myself, but actually tackling the tasks themselves is not as much fun.

I've been tossing around the idea of scrapping all the complicated plans and throwing one of those popular "destination weddings" everyone talks about.

FAIRYTALE PRINCESS
Who hasn't dreamed of putting on a ballgown and meeting her Prince Charming in front of a glittering palace? Or slapping on a clamshell bikini and mermaid tail for a dive into the oceanspray?

GEEKFEST
Combining the historic romance of England with the epic dorkiness of my favorite childhood toy...

I DREAM OF KITTY
On the groom's side: the Ogishis of Tokyo. On the bride's side: Toad, Hello Kitty, & Dear Daniel. This could really work out!

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: 16% of weddings are destination events. (source: Susan Breslow Sardone on about.com)

TRACY TURNS 8...PLUS 20

The girlier half of Traoki wanted to celebrate her last birthday as a single lady with a pretty-in-pink Hello Kitty tea party, and the manly half kindly volunteered for KP. Little did he know it would cost him the entire weekend.



Everything turned out beautifully and we laid a spread that would have made my childhood tea party heroes proud. If only Strawberry Shortcake, Eloise, and Mary Poppins could have come too!

HELLO TEAS
* Generic Japanese Green Tea *
* Grace Pure Peppermint Cut Leaves*
* David Rio Fuji Apple Black Tea *
* Mariage Freres Earl Grey Silver Tips *

HELLO PINK MENU
* Hello Kitty cupcakes *
* Pound cake with strawberries & cream *
* Crustless ham sandwiches *
* Hello Kitty toast with raspberry jam *
* Star butter cookies with pink lemon icing *
* Checkerboard wafer cookies *
* Pink gumballs *
* Hello Kitty Pez *


The guests were glowing in pink finery and came bearing wonderful gifts. I am a lucky girl to have such very nice friends! The definite "hit" of the party was Alice's homemade Hello Kitty pinata. Although the question remans, "Why does Morgan carry a baseball bat around in his Audi?!?"


Thanks to everyone who came and hope you had lots of fun and good things to eat! Check out more photos on Flickr!

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: The median age for first-time brides is 27 years; for grooms, it's 29. (source: Susan Breslow Sardone on about.com)

KETCHUP

Haven't posted in quite a few months, because our blog disappeared.

"How is it possible?!? What are you monkeys doing over at Google?" I ranted to the poor patient Kingman.

Turns out they didn't lose my blog so much as I forgot which login it was registered to. Hehehe, my apologies. A little human error never hurt anyone, right?

So here's a quick summary of the holiday season:

THANKSGIVING

We flung open the doors to our little apartment and welcomed in the hungry masses. It was the first time Naoki's parents and my mother had met, and we did have a small culture clash.

The solution? HOT WAFFLES!



CHRISTMAS

We went to Winter Park to celebrate with family and do a little skiing. This year, Naoki's sister Megumi and her fiance Ryan were able to make it!

Sportscenter Moment: RYAN'S SNOWMOBILE BAILOUT


NEW YEAR

Dugan and Alice invited us over for fondue on NYE. Chi-chi! And then we had everyone over on New Year's Day for winter melon soup, homemade potstickers and steamed fish. Chinese-y!

The week's highlight: DAVID'S 28TH BIRTHDAY


WEDDING PLANS

We dusted off the old to-do list and managed to tackle a few items.

Bridesmaid dresses and shoes? Check.

Florist? Check.

Photographer? Check.

First Dance? Have been seriously contemplating a song I totally loved and totally forgot about until seeing an '80s Hair Bands Greatest Hits commercial on TV recently. On second thought, hold the checkmark...and that can of industrial-strength Aqua Net.

Star Jones imitation: TIARA SHOPPING (oh yeah...believe it!)

YOU GOT TICKETS?!?

Naoki and I have received some wonderful engagement gifts from generous friends. Here's a hearty and sincere THANK YOU to all the kind souls.

Erin and Dave surprised us first by sending my favorite item on the registry. Barfolomew really brings some fun to the breakfast table.


Mmmm...appetizing!

The Dooleys then stepped up and invited us over for cocktails and dinner. Beth tried to make the invitation sound oh so casual...and we show up to find caviar and The Dom!!!

High Rollers True to style, Doug E. Fresh went over the top and presented us with a sleek new iPod nano for dessert. I've already filled it with my favorite emo, Brit pop, and '80s jams!

Dune rounded out the music theme with two tickets for Sunday night's Death Cab for Cutie concert.
Had a great time mingling with the young folk. And it was such a wholesome crowd--we only counted two lighters and one brief whiff of sweet, sweet smoke.

I AM SIXTEEN

With the help of my amazing bridesmaids, I've just crossed the second major hurdle of wedding planning--I purchased my gown yesterday!!! Don't want to give away too much of the surprise before the big day, but think Leisl von Trapp. Hopefully Naoki doesn't end up the same way as Rolf.

Here are the better shops I went to and some of the gowns I tried on. One costs about $1000 more than the other. Guess which?

Eve's Bridal - beautiful salon, knowledgeable staff, great service, samples available for sale


The Unique Bride - November sample sale, helpful staff


Bridal Galleria - nice salon, friendly staff, large selection, no photos allowed

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: Queen Victoria popularized the white wedding gown. She wore a white silk and lace gown with an 18-foot train at her wedding to Prince Albert in 1840. (source: Susan Breslow Sardone on about.com)

CHECK, CHECK, CHECK IT OUT

It's been 5 weeks that I've been "reserved" for a work assignment, leaving me to sit at home and click through some very exciting computer-based training modules. So exciting that I had to watch extensive daytime television and bake some cupcakes to calm myself down. Here are the fruits of my labor:



I also took advantage of the time off to check a few items off our to-do list:

1) THE WEDDING PARTY - We've selected our attendants! Of course, I called up my favorite lovely ladies right away and they agreed to help out.


Maid of Honor: Beth is responsible, organized, and a beautiful example of happily wedded bliss.







Bridesmaid: Dune is already enthusiastically planning the bachelorette party.






A couple of months and much nagging later, Naoki finally talked to his buddies.



Best Man: Dugan has camped on our couch after many long nights of partying. We're simply hoping he shows up to the wedding on time.







Groomsman: Tad worries me for obvious reasons.






2) THE OFFICIANT - We selected Reverend Lili Goodman Freitas for her sincerity, calming presence, and belief in the power of carefully chosen words.

3) CAKE TOPPERS - I won them in an eBay auction and they safely arrived in the mail from Hong Kong this week.



Not one of the 5 people who knows what they are? Can't figure it out? You'll just have to wait until the reception where they'll be revealed in delicious style.

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: There are 12 people in an average-sized wedding party. (source: National Association of Wedding Ministers)

GIFT HORSE

So my faithful bridesmaid Dune accompanied me to my first bridal show this weekend. We brought the brass knuckles and Vaseline in case there was any scuffling for the last samples of buttercream and cake. Luckily all the other dainty little brides took one look at us and stepped off. That's called Respect. Either that or we looked really hungry.

It was a pretty small show--possibly 20 vendors consisting of mostly photographers, honeymoon resorts, tuxedo rentals, and a couple of bridal gown boutiques. Admission to the show (I scored free tickets thanks to The Knot.) included entry slips for the different drawings in each of the booths...dream honeymoon in the Bahamas, $100 off flowers, etc. We also got to attend a fashion show for the latest trends in bridal and bridesmaid gowns. If this show was any indicator, the lastest trends are UGLY! Think Star Jones tacky. Ick. Classic dress for me, please.

The emcee went up to announce the winners of the drawing. One lucky bride was going to win the dress of her dreams from among those seen on the runway! Jeez...poor thing.

Slowly now to build the drama...

"The lucky bride is getting married in September!" Well, it's a popular month for weddings.

"September 7!" Hmmm...that's near my date. Whew...close call with fashion death there.

"I'm not sure how to say her name. Miss L-I-A-N-G. Tracy, you're our lucky winner!" Oh shit! Didn't she say September 7?!? I guess I have poor penmanship. Dammit those dresses were ugly. Do I have to wear one of those things on my wedding day? Fuuuuuckkk...well, better raise my hand and receive my just deserts for being a Snobby McSnobberson. God must have a wicked sense of humor.

Dune said later that I looked ready to vomit into my freebie bag. She wondered why I was so unhappy while simultaneously calculating whether she could move fast enough to avoid any spitup. Good news is that once I actually read the fine print it turned out that I had won a $500 gift certificate to be used at David's Bridal on ANY purchase, not just a dress. YIPPEE, FREE VEIL AND LINGERIE! Now I feel a little sorry about using those brass knuckles on the little old emcee. Oops.

WEDDING FACTS OF THE DAY: The average amount spent on a bridal gown is $800. David's Bridal accounts for 20% of all bridal gown sales. (source: Susan Breslow Sardone on about.com)

SWEET AND LOWDOWN

We finally threw an engagement party and were pleasantly surprised by the results.

THE GOOD
Our night started with an attempt to class things up by meeting at the jazz lounge in Shanghai 1930 for appetizers, cocktails, and jazz. We had a great turnout!

Justine drove all the way from LA and Itien dragged herself away from the meat market at Suite 181. Matt and Eva came bearing gifts. Michael and Ken chose our party over an exciting night at The Endup.

Brent and Bernie ventured out of the exciting World of Warcraft. Cheerio and Nicole carted the crew up from South Bay. And Beth left beautiful Baby Jordan at home with a sitter for the very first time!

David tinkled the ivories and gave the professionals a run for the money.

THE BAD...ASS!
The party moved on to 111 Minna so we could ditch the class act and shake up some trouble.

Alice and Ryan got things started with their take on dance classics such as The Wave, The Robot, and The Shopping Cart. And then things heated up when Khang and David finally realized they were meant for each other...

AND THE UGLY
Why would someone leave a bouncy toy horse in a SOMA parking lot? I'm not sure, but the greater mystery is why Khang felt compelled to attack it with with such vim. It looked innocent enough and I'm pretty certain the horse was just minding his own business. The springs fought back and flung Khang headlong 0nto the pavement, setting him off on a wild Tourette's session and the rest of us on a laughing fit.

All in all...we had a wonderful night and are deeply grateful to have such beautiful, generous, crazy friends.

Check out more pictures at our flickr page and in Justine's photo album.

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: The average American engagement lasts 14 months. (source: Susan Breslow Sardone on about.com)

LIKE A GOOD NEIGHBOR

It's amazing how much stuff two people can own. I guess that's what happens when one of those persons has a minor shopping problem.

Moving stats:
2 weeks of packing
60+ boxes
24' truck (filled to capacity)
3 professional movers
5.25 hours
$730

Ouch! We figure it's worth it since none of our lovely things were damaged. But still...next time we're probably going to pick up some Illegals.

Here are a few vignettes from our first weekend in the apartment. I think the neighbors are pretty sketched out by us already.

1) I bump into Julio and his young daughter Sophia (unit #4) on the way to the dumpster with my arms full of empty boxes. They are all liquor boxes. He gives me a sideways stare, pulls his baby a little closer, and makes a mental note that I have a severe drinking problem.

2) The kitchen is JAM PACKED (This is what comes of the Williams-Sonoma discount.) so we had to buy a massive butcher block island for the extra cupboard space. (Had to go to IKEA since I no longer have the aforementioned Williams-Sonoma discount.) Michael and Janet (unit #3) hate us for starting construction in the middle of the night.

3)While in the middle of cooking our first meal in the new home, I realize we don't have garlic or green onions. I lock us out of the apartment in a rush to the grocery store and we have to break back in through the kitchen window. Susanna (unit #1) comes walking up the driveway with her kids just as Naoki is shimmying through the busted window with his booty and legs dangling in the air. She says nothing, but herds the children inside and slams the door.

GOLDILOCKS

Time to back things up a little since some of you have been asking how we picked our wedding site...

Once Naoki and I set our wedding budget, I consulted my towering stack of new magazines to see what I should do next. Each one told me that all the other brides were already snatching up the desirable ceremony and reception sites. Each stressed that I should immediately book one as well if I didn't want to end up hosting the wedding at Joe's Shrimp Shack.

Thusly whipped into a bridal frenzy, I hopped online (Here Comes the Guide and The Knot are very handy websites.) and started looking for locations that matched my criteria:

1) It had to be outdoors.
2) It had have architectural interest.

I plugged the candidates into a spreadsheet in order to filter, sort and do all manner of fun things until the list had been whittled down to a manageable number. Naoki and I ended up scouting the following places in person:

Palmdale Estates:

Too Big

Ainsley House: Too Small

(I'm pulling a move that Naoki and I like to call "Lil Sis.")

Ardenwood Farm:

Too Far

Rengstorff House: Just Right

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: 30% of receptions are held in churches; 20% in hotels; 20% in country clubs; and 10% each in fraternal halls, private homes, and other locations. (source: National Association of Wedding Ministers)

THE HOT BOX

In the course of packing for our move, I've discovered that good boxes are hard to find. Have become a real scavenger--circling shopping strips and convenience stores late at night on the make for goodies.

Hit the motherlode outside of a liquor store this weekend. Screeched up into the lot, popped my trunk, and started loading up with (empty) cartons of Jack.

Ran out of room and ended up leaving my dignity behind.

WEDDING FACT OF THE DAY: 64% of couples live together before marriage. (source: National Association of Wedding Ministers)

HUNGRY HUNTER

Good news! After a couple of weeks of apartment hunting, Naoki and I have found a 2-bedroom place in San Mateo, right on the Burlingame border. So it's back to the 'burbs for us in September, but this time without our roomie. It'll be a new domestic dynamic...playing house with just the Mr. and the little Mrs.

We used this spiffy site when searching for apartment listings. It combines Craigslist postings and Google maps. http://www.housingmaps.com/

Have to admit, I'm excited but a wee bit nervous. Always suspected we were more courteous to each other and smoothed over our arguments a little more quickly simply because there was a witness to our behaviour at home. How will we act without having Dai around? Here's to hoping that we'll take along a few good habits when we move.

DOMO ARIGATO, SCHMINGLEBOTO

And now, ladies and gentlemen, a word from our sponsors...

It's time for a commercial break so that I can advertise the great talent of a good friend.

Those of you who see us regularly in our casual mode (read: sans makeup or hair products) may have noticed our engagement photos and wondered, "Who are those pretty babies?" Indeed, where did those shining eyes and bright smiles come from? Where did the bad skin go?

Ahhh...the magic of photography. Mister Tran knows how to work lighting and a camera. And this is key: he'll also do touchups in Photoshop.

We thank him for getting up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday morning so that we could capture the best natural lighting. We thank him for driving all over town to shoot in the most interesting locations. We thank him for his infinite patience while dealing with two Stiffy McStiffersons with no idea how to "act natural" in front of a camera lens.

THANK YOU, KHANG!!!

FAMILY TIES

As soon as we got back from Sonoma, we called our families with the big news. Those conversations are transcribed below.

ring ring
TRACY: "Hi, Daddy. Naoki proposed! I'm getting married!!!"
DAD: "Amazing. I actually gave up on you years ago. Figured you'd be an old maid forever. "
TRACY: "Ummm..I'm only 27."
DAD: "Well like I always say, better late than never."

ring ring
TRACY: "Mom! I've got exciting news! Naoki and I are engaged!"
MOM: "That's nice, dear. Mommy has company over. Why don't we discuss this another time?"

A lukewarm start, but she did come around to the idea. A few days later I received this email from her:

----------------------------
On 8/1/05, Karen Liang wrote:

Hi Tracy & Noaki,

Tracy, do you want to wear a traditional Chinese chipau ? If so, we can shop for one when we are inTaiwan later this year.
----------------------------

Unfortunately, it was followed a day later with this message on my answering machine:

MOM: "On second thought, Chinese gowns are really meant for girls with nice figures. I wonder if you could lose that belly roll in only 3 months?"

I deleted the message and made myself a milkshake.

Oh yeah, Naoki called his parents too.

ring ring
NAOKI: "Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad! I've got big news to tell you. Call me back."
ring ring
NAOKI: "Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. Left you a message the other day. I have something I want to share with you. Give me a call."
ring ring
NAOKI: "Ummm...Mom? Dad? Did you get my messages? Have some news. Call me back?"
ring ring
NAOKI: "Hello?????"

FUN WITH ETYMOLOGY

I guess the first thing to explain is this "Traoki" business. I always thought it sounded vaguely Tolkien, but apparently Word disagrees and finds it more Russian than Elvish. Damn Autocorrect always changes it to "troika." Stupid Microsoft.

Traoki is the dual presence of Tracy and Naoki--sometimes spotted at glamorous events on the town, but most commonly found lounging on the couch in pajamas. You might say we're a Poor Man's Bennifer. No Hollywood $$$, no US Weekly covers, no fake tans...just Naoki's good nature and my bloodlust for boardgames.

The credit for naming this two-headed monster goes to our roommate of 4 years (!) Dai, who finally decided that he's had enough and is moving out in September. Sob.